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Emotions Happen

Practice What You Preach

The truth is, emotions happen. A big reason I’m so keen on self development and positivity is because you will develop habits that will get you through the hard times in your life. Hard times are inevitable for anyone but having practices in place to help you navigate these challenges is what will differentiate it from unbearable, to just challenging. Good practices will allow you to handle tough, unexpected situations in a mature way that doesn’t allow your emotions to overstep their boundaries. Instead, they allow your mind to remain calm and strategically plan out the best course of action. I’ve applied all of the things I’ve covered on this site in my own life because I’m a firm believer in practicing what you preach.

What do good practices look like?

Think of any stressful situation that was suddenly dropped on you. How did you respond? Were you scared? Did you panic? Did you yell? Were you overwhelmed with too many emotions? Feelings are a good thing when you can control them but when you allow them too much control, they can overwhelm you. Let’s take being scared for instance. There is nothing wrong with being scared, in fact being scared is a good thing. It means our fight or flight response is working. What happens when we let being scared go too far is we freeze up, can’t move, or think which allows anxiety, fear, stress, and many other emotions to enter the body making an already uncomfortable situation even worse. Instead, what we need to do is acknowledge that we are scared but still be able to think clearly and in a way that will help get us out of that situation. That’s where setting boundaries on your feelings comes into play. You no longer are allowing that feeling to dictate what happens next. Instead you are taking control of the situation by remaining calm and trusting in what you’ve worked on.

How do you get there?

You need to address the weaknesses in your life and the areas where you are most vulnerable. For me, anger was one of my weaknesses. When something unexpected would happen that was displeasing to me, I would be quick to get angry. Much like being scared, anger isn’t a bad thing when used in its proper place but that’s not how it was being used. Instead of taking the time to explain my thoughts and feelings, I would raise my voice and get upset.
Emotions Happen

It took years to get control of this area. Between working out, meditation, church, some friends being brutally honest, people holding me accountable, and a desire to be better, I was able to make big strides in this area. But it all started with being aware of my weak points, emotions happen that trigger certain areas inside me and being open to changing them. Once you have identified those areas, start doing some research as to what you can do to help fix them. Start with Google. The web is full of more information than you could ever imagine and you’re not going to be the first one trying to improve your life. So start with a simple search and expand from there. Soon you will have a ton of resources you can dive into and help you on your journey. Don’t try to do it all at once! Remember that any significant change takes time so instead, embrace the materials and go at a rate that allows you to retain everything you’re studying.

That doesn’t mean you’ll be perfect

The thing about weaknesses are they tend to always linger around and there will still be times when it rears its ugly head. There are times I still get upset then look back and think about how the situation could have been handled differently. That doesn’t make you a failure, it just means you have to keep working on those areas and improvements can still be made. Keep being conscious of these areas, keep working on taking control of them, and don’t beat yourself up if you accidentally slip. Emotions happen, but life is about becoming better each day. It’s not about being perfect. Just better than the person you were yesterday.

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Donovan Armstrong

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